A site for my art, music, pictures, and words.

Been Busy…been buried in things.  I feel like I’ve racked my head against a brick wall for WEEKS and MONTHS even, until finally I found an old program I downloaded over a year ago…..I used to work in Mental Health, and I would spend every other weekend, taking care of the mentally challenged. Basically I had a A LOT of time on my hands, so I downloaded ‘Gimp’ a program much like Photoshop, just a bit of a different lingo. I was a bit frustrated with it, back then. Or perhaps I just lacked patience. Anyway, I pulled it back up and decided to mess around with it, and well….needless to say, I’ve been lost in it for about a week now.  I’m quite impressed!  So I’ve taken my paintings, the ones hanging here, in my studio now, surrounding me, and put them thru the wringer of my imagination, and WOW…..

This is a drawing I kind of, sketched out, for ideas, on how this program works, what Can I do? What does this do? What’s this? and so on and so on…….so this is something I drew, put through a grid, with burns, with circles, with curves and fractals…and whatever the lingo might be. Here, you can find more http://www.etsy.com/shop/SuzenJueL.

My Family has been here for almost 3 weeks. It’s CRAZY! I’m not used to being around a lot of people, I’m a bit reclusive and I rather like it that way.  So it’s going to be non stop, once they leave, to go back to Georgia, my other son is joining the Airforce as well, just like the one that has been visiting….So another son of mine will be living with us, temporarily, til he goes to Texas for basic Training, in January, THEN my brother in law, is going to  move in with us. Times are tough all around, and it’s the right thing to do. HOW my sanity will hold up, is entirely another story. Stay tuned!

This is why I bury myself in things I can get my ‘creative flow’ out…inside of. My madness. It’s my own kind of madness. We all do what we need to do, to get through life’s  bends and curves, jagged lines and steep hills….ya just never know where it’ll take you.

Meanwhile, I’ve put up a display of some of my art at Living Room #13 as well. I’ll be messing around with that from time to time, adding new things…til I burn myself out on it, and it becomes useless to me, for awhile, until again, one day I rack my head against a wall, until a few bricks come loose, and allow me to peek into another realm, and something else, grows…..

A few years ago, I had gone to Georgia and laid down on a giant trampoline, my friend and I…the sun was so warm and there was quite a bit that was going to take place in the coming few days. Musicians from all over the world, would be gathering for a weekend of performances, food, laughter and campfire jams.

Late at night, a handful of us had gathered around a campfire with various colored guitars and went around in a circle, playing with each other, listening to each other, and I had heard someone singing Hallelujah. I had heard it a couple times before, but for some reason, it really had an impact on me. Perhaps it was the moonshine, or maybe the full moon, but my ears were absorbing every sound, every breath, every  note.

Recently…I had spent the weekend with a girlfriend not too far away. We cooked, laughed, told stories, played guitar and just did the silly things we often do when we get together.  On the last day I spent with her, I took out her little trampoline and jumped up and down on it, wishing I could back flip in her modest apartment, and I plopped down on it, just laying there, immediately being taken back to Georgia, back down on the trampoline, looking at a beautiful blue sky.

Last night, I was flipping through channels on the television, and a Rufus Wainwright documentary came on.  I decided to watch a bit. I had been introduced to Rufus Wainwright’s music when I watched a film called “I’m Your Man” it was about Leonard Cohen, who is the writer of the song ‘Hallelujah’ a song I’ve decided to learn, after my trip to Georgia.
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Faster than the colors could be seen, they were gone. Then they would come again, spinning in circles, spinning around. Eyes closed to the chaotic spin of vibrant sounds and voiceless pictures. One thing would lead to another, the grass led to the tree, the tree led to the roots, the roots led to the earth, the earth fed the roots, the roots fed the tree, the tree grew, the branches formed like fingers reaching into the sky, the sky was grey, blackbirds were like silhouettes in motion flying across the sky, the clouds hung in the sky, the sky changed colors and turned to tomorrow…maybe sleep would come then, but that’s wishful thinking.
Dreams full speed ahead, bright colors, sounds, smells, emotions…even memories. From room to room, the rooms change, the house gets remodeled the people age from dream to dream, from decade to decade. Their names never to be heard, their faces are always remembered, in the dreams, they do not leave the dreams, they do not occupy life, as I know it, while in a wakened state of mind. This would become me, awake or asleep, there could be no difference, could there?
And that’s when I lie there in bed, eyes open to pitch blackness, and feel like my battery is dying, but the sparks that are flying from it’s passing, keep me wide awake…until eventually, like a plane crashing into the sea, the speed stops, things become still, suddenly…a slow sinking, a peaceful stillness that becomes sleep, as we know it. This other realm begins at this point, the one I sink slowly into, and become like. No longer able to understand the difference between the two, I let go of the former and fall into the nether…
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I’m not BIG on Holidays, I’m just big on Love, Friends, those I’ve celebrated life with over the years and years.  I”m not into ‘avatars’ but I have one…..So HAPPY HOLIDAYS from the VIRTUAL ME, and of course…..me